


The Set-up

by TheFreakZone



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-05
Updated: 2020-08-05
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:14:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25720411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheFreakZone/pseuds/TheFreakZone
Summary: Lovino's flatmate has invited a friend over for lunch, but when the guest arrives, Lovino is home alone and it'll be up to him to keep the guest entertained until his flatmate returns.
Relationships: Prussia/South Italy (Hetalia)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 65





	The Set-up

**Author's Note:**

> Ever since I wrote Black Leather the thought of Prumano has been nagging at me and today it finally happened for no reason at all. Also I really wanted to write Spamano as best friends, for a change, so there. Hope you like it! n_n
> 
> Warning: very lame smut written by a non-native speaker at 3 AM. Plus not edited because it's nearly 4 AM as I type this.
> 
> Enjoy. I guess.

**THE SET-UP**

"Gil is coming over for lunch today."

Lovino looked up from his textbook and at his flatmate. Antonio was busy piercing the bottom of a plastic bottle, which he then intended to use as a substitute for their recently broken showerhead. Only one of the many cheap—but surprisingly effective—tricks that the Spaniard came up with whenever something broke down.

"Who?"

"Gil. Gilbert." Antonio stopped what he was doing to look at Lovino with a doubtful frown. "Haven't you met Gil?"

"You may have mentioned him before," Lovino answered after considering it for a bit, "but no, I don't think so."

"Ah." Antonio resumed his task. "Well, he's a great guy. I think you'll get along."

"He's coming for lunch, you said?"

"Yup."

"Are you cooking?"

"Yup."

"Nice."

* * *

_Nice_ meant that Lovino loved Antonio's dishes. He was a fantastic cook, and although it was rare for him to have the time and will to do something elaborate, it was always worth it. So, in general terms, Lovino was all for Antonio cooking.

The problem was that, no matter how good the end result, the process was always… complicated.

To say that Antonio went manic when he was in the kitchen would be a bit of an overstatement — but only a bit. He was passionate. He was precise. He was aggressive towards anyone who stepped into his two-meter radius of personal space. And he was, not to anyone's surprise, an extreme purist when it came to recipes.

"Can't you just, like, _not_ put chicken?" Lovino asked, and immediately regretted it when Antonio glared daggers at him.

" _Not put chicken_?" he repeated, indignant. "I'm cooking _paella_ , Lovino, and a proper paella must _always_ have chicken."

"But—"

"Would you make a pizza Margherita without mozzarella?"

"Never!"

"There you have it. Ugh, this is bad," he groaned, rubbing his temple with nervous fingers. "I really thought I had all the ingredients."

"Change of plans then?"

"Of course not! I promised Gil a paella and a paella I'll give him. I just…" He checked his watch. "If I get the car, I can go to the market real quick and get the chicken. We may end up eating later than planned, but…"

Lovino hummed in agreement.

A second later, he flinched in horror.

"Wait! What if he shows up while you're out?"

Antonio shrugged nonchalantly. He was already grabbing his car keys and throwing on a jacket. "Let him in," he simply said. "Talk to him."

He was out of the flat before Lovino could even think of his next protest.

* * *

Life just loved messing with Lovino, and Antonio had only been gone for five minutes when the doorbell rang. He gave himself a couple of second to mentally prepare himself before opening the door.

And when he saw Gilbert standing on the hall, he confirmed that no, he definitely hadn't met him before. He'd remember.

Gilbert was Antonio's age, which meant he was a couple of years older than Lovino. Gilbert was a little taller than Antonio, which meant he was _a lot_ taller than Lovino. Gilbert was… not more handsome than Antonio, because that was nearly impossible, but he was very good-looking. Which meant that Lovino short-circuited and failed to say anything.

"Uh, hi?" offered Gilbert after a few long seconds of awkward silence. "You must be Lovino."

"A-Ah, yes," he blabbered. "Gilbert?"

"Just Gil is fine. Is, uh, isn't Antonio home?"

Lovino let out a deep, exasperated sigh, and "No," he answered. "Come on in."

* * *

Gilbert laughed when Lovino told him the chicken incident. He laughed _loud_.

"That does sound like Antonio. I guess we can only wait."

"Yes, um…" Lovino fidgeted nervously on the spot. He was bad at playing host, especially when it wasn't his guest. "Take a seat?" he offered, pointing at their old, tattered couch. "I can offer you a beer."

"I like beer," Gil smiled. He had a pretty smile.

Lovino tried to smile back, and really hoped he wasn't blushing.

* * *

"I've been wanting to meet you for a while," said Gilbert when they were both sitting on the couch.

Lovino was certain he was blushing now. "R-Really? Why?"

Gil nodded. "Antonio talks about you a lot," he answered between large gulps of beer.

"He does?"

"Yes, of course. You're his best friend."

" _I am?_ "

"Uh, yes. You didn't know that?" he laughed.

"I thought that was Francis," Lovino mumbled back, embarrassed.

"Nah." Gil waved his hand, dismissing the idea completely. "Francis and I are great friends of Antonio's, sure, and _sure_ , we'll probably end up in jail together sooner than later, but… No, you're totally his _bestest_ friend."

"Ah."

Lovino's phone rang then, because Life loves these little coincidences, and because Life loves these little coincidences, it had to be Antonio.

"Am I your best friend?" Lovino asked the moment he picked up.

" _Uh… Hello to you too_ ," said Antonio's voice on the other end. " _And yes, of course you're my best friend. Why do you make it sound like it's the revelation of the century? Anyway, the thing is, there's a lot of traffic, so it's going to take me a little longer. Is Gil home already?_ "

"Y-Yes, Gil is here. Do you want me to pass him the phone or…?"

" _No, it's okay. Just apologize on my behalf. And sorry to you too, I know you don't like hosting strangers. Not that Gil is a stranger, but you didn't know him before. You get what I mean_."

"Yes, I get it. So, um, any idea on how long it'll take you to get back?"

" _No idea. But I'll try to make it fast_."

"Okay. See you."

" _Bye_."

Lovino hung up and slowly put down the phone. He looked at Gilbert.

"I _am_ Antonio's best friend."

Gilbert's grin split his face.

"Yes, you are!"

And when he reached for a fist bump, Lovino could only reciprocate, his own smile so big he feared it might strain his cheeks.

* * *

They were halfway through their second beer when Gilbert cleared his throat, a nervous gesture that could only precede an uncomfortable question. Lovino braced himself.

"Hey, Lovino, I've been meaning to ask you…" he started, scratching his eyebrow as he spoke.

"Hm?"

"You and Antonio, um, is there… _anything_ between the two of you? Don't answer if you don't want to," he was quick to add, "but it's just… I don't know, the way he always talks about you… Francis and I kinda have a bet going on," he admitted with a chuckle.

Taken aback, it took Lovino a moment to react, but he was glad to find that his laugh sounded natural when it came.

"We're not a couple, if that's what you're asking," he answered. "We did go out for a few months, a while ago," he admitted after a beat, "but we both agreed that we were better off as friends. _Best_ friends," he added with a grin.

"So you're just friends now?"

"Well," Lovino started to correct, blushed when he realized what he was doing, then decided there was no going back and said it anyway: "Friends with benefits, I guess."

"Oh?" Gilbert laughed, raising a curious eyebrow.

Lovino felt his cheeks heat up. "W-Well, it's just that…" he mumbled, looking anywhere but at Gil. "We're both single, and sometimes the body wants what the body wants, and…"

"It's okay, I get it," Gilbert interjected, still laughing, although quieter than before. "I actually think that's a great relationship you two have. Gee, I can't imagine myself like that with any of my exes."

"No? Bad breakups?"

Gilbert sighed as he leaned back on the couch, running a hand through his hair — which, by the way, looked incredibly soft, but Lovino definitely didn't think that.

"I dated my girlfriend for two years, then we broke up. Then I dated my boyfriend for two and a half years, then we broke up. And now my ex-girlfriend and my ex-boyfriend are dating each other; have been for, what, four years now? And don't get me wrong, I'm happy for them, but it's… weird."

"Huh."

Lovino wished he could offer more in return, but he had hardly listened to anything that had come out of Gilbert's mouth after the word "boyfriend". Nothing special. It had just caught his attention. It definitely hadn't awoken any kind of new interest on this friend of a friend.

"Lovino?"

"Huh?"

"Your phone is ringing."

"Oh shit." Lovino hurried to pick it up, desperately hoping that Gilbert hadn't picked up on the reason behind his spacing out, and smiled, relieved, when he saw Antonio's name on the screen. Surely he'd tell him that he was on his way back and he'd arrive in a matter of minutes and—

" _Please don't be mad_ ," were the first words Antonio said as soon as Lovino picked up.

"Why would I be mad?" asked Lovino, mentally preparing himself to be mad.

" _I, um, well, eh… Can you cook lunch?_ "

"What?" Lovino snapped, and then, calmer: "Was there no chicken at the market?"

" _It's not that_ ," Antonio chuckled nervously. " _I… I got a flat tire. I already called the insurance company and they're sending over a tow-truck, but it might take a while. So I thought you can cook and have lunch with Gil? And I'll arrive later. Eventually._ "

Lovino closed his eyes and counted to ten.

"Sure," he said.

" _A million thanks! And sorry, terribly sorry. I'll make it up to you, somehow. Thanks!_ "

The call ended then, but Lovino kept the phone pressed to his ear for a little longer, giving him a few seconds to wrap his head around the situation.

"What's the matter?" Gilbert asked.

Lovino sighed.

"Do you like pizza?"

* * *

Gilbert's face brightened up considerably when he took the first bite.

"Shit, this is _delicious_!" he exclaimed, and proceeded to devour the rest of the slice in two fast bites.

"Thanks," Lovino smiled around his own portion of pizza. "Although my brother makes it better."

"No, no, that's impossible," refused Gilbert, already halfway through his second slice. "This is the greatest pizza ever. Can't be bested. God, I envy whoever marries you."

An astounded laugh left Lovino before he could control it. "Thanks again," he said, "although I doubt that'll ever happen."

"Huh? Why? You don't want to get married?"

"It's not that." Lovino chewed his pizza slowly, his gaze fixed on the floor. "It's just that I don't date much."

"Why not? You're gorgeous!"

Lovino's gaze snapped up to look at Gilbert, who had stopped mid-chew, surprised by his own comment.

"I-I mean," he blabbered, his pale cheeks colouring red, "you're good-looking, objectively speaking, so I'd have guessed that you have it easy to find a date."

Lovino felt his own blush, although whether it came at the compliment or out of embarrassment, he didn't know.

"There was Antonio," he commented, the words heavy on his tongue, "and this girl I dated in high-school, Emma, who then turned out to be a lesbian. That's… That's the extent of my love life," he admitted quietly.

"Really?" Gil asked. He sounded genuinely surprised.

"I'm not very good with people."

Gilbert hummed. "Well," he mused out loud, grabbing his last slice of pizza, "for what it's worth, you're being very good with me."

* * *

"You mentioned a brother before?" Gil asked later, when they'd finished eating and washing the dishes and had found themselves once again sharing the couch.

"Yes, I have a little brother."

"Cool! So do I!"

"Really? How's yours?"

"Luddy is…" Gil made a pause, a pondering expression on his face, and "awesome," he finished. "He's very clever. Graduated as a mechanical engineer last year, best of his class; now he's climbing the ranks in this highly successful company."

"Wow."

"I know. What about yours?"

"Feli is really cool, too. But in a different way. He's an artist. Paints, sculpts, photographs… And he's incredible at everything he does. He's made it into prestigious art galleries and such."

"Awesome."

"Yeah…" Lovino mumbled downcast. Then realized how that looked and flinched. "I'm happy for him! I really am. Feli is my baby brother and I love him to death."

"But…?" Gil prompted, having grasped that there was something else, and Lovino let out a shaky sigh.

"Do you know that thing," he said, his gaze fixed on a very uninteresting spot on the floor, "when you make something for the first time and it's good enough, but then you attempt it a second time and you make it perfect?"

"Yes?"

"I feel that's how my parents made their kids," he chuckled humourlessly. "I'm good enough. I'm average. And Feli is better in every single way."

There was silence then, and it lasted for longer than Lovino found bearable. But then:

"Yeah," sighed Gil, "I think I know what you mean."

"Do you feel like that, too?" Lovino asked, tentatively, daring to glance at Gilbert.

"When your little brother has achieved all that and meanwhile you've just dropped out of college for the third time, yes, it feels like that." He groaned. "My father sees fit to remind me every time we meet."

"That sucks."

"It does. Although," and he was looking straight at Lovino now, a knowing glint in his eyes, "I think the judgment hits harder when it comes from within. You're too hard on yourself, Lovino. I think you should give yourself more credit."

Silence again, but much more comfortable this time. Lovino raised his gaze, looking directly at Gilbert, and Gilbert looked back at him with a warm expression.

Lovino suddenly wanted to crawl closer and hug him. He had the feeling that Gil would welcome him.

His phone rang again and the moment died.

"Y-Yes?" Lovino picked up. His mouth felt dry.

" _Lovi_ ," said Antonio. " _I'm sorry. You're not going to believe this_."

"What happened now?"

" _Remember that I got a flat? And a tow-truck was coming?_ "

"Yes?"

" _The tow-truck got a flat as well_."

"Oh, you've _got_ to be _kidding me_."

" _I'm sorry!_ " cried Antonio. He sounded genuinely distraught. " _God, is Gil still around? Tell him I'm sorry_."

"Yes, he is. What now? Are you waiting for another tow-truck? A tow-truck for tow-trucks? A nanogram of good luck?"

" _Well, yes, the driver called for reinforcements. But we don't know how long it'll take. Very sorry_."

"It's okay," he sighed. "You're fine, right?"

" _Yes, yes, I'm perfectly well. Physically speaking. I feel horrible though._ "

"It's okay," Lovino repeated, this time with more purpose. His gaze accidentally met Gilbert's and he smiled. "Don't worry about us."

* * *

"You mentioned before that you were single, right?" asked Gilbert casually.

Lovino hummed in confirmation. They were sat together on the couch, closer than they'd ever been before. Their hands between them kept touching, brief brushes that made Lovino's hairs rise and his heart beat faster. He wondered if Gil felt the same.

"I'm single, too. Haven't dated anyone since I broke up with Roderich."

"Ah."

Gilbert held his hand then, gave it a light squeeze, and when Lovino looked at him, his gaze met Gil's, intense and focused, and he felt that every rational thought left his brain.

Including the consideration that Antonio may come back at any moment.

Next thing he knew, Gilbert had pulled him onto his lap, and he had followed willingly—gladly—and suddenly they were kissing like both of them had been dying to do it for the last few hours. Which was probably true.

Lovino held Gil's face between his hands, traced his cheekbones and jawline, all while shamelessly deepening the kiss. He felt Gilbert's strong arms around his waist, and the curious hand that ventured under his top, and how slick Gilbert's tongue was where it slid against his own.

"W-Wait," he gasped when Gil abandoned his mouth to kiss his neck.

"What?" Gil mumbled back, his teeth grazing a sensitive spot below his hear.

"Not here," Lovino managed to sigh, then moaned when Gilbert squeezed his ass. "I'm not doing it on this couch. God knows what we might catch."

Gilbert chuckled directly into Lovino's ear. "Okay," he agreed. "Wanna see if I can carry you to your room?"

Lovino laughed and pulled him into another kiss.

"Please."

* * *

Lovino wasn't sure what he was saying, but he kept screaming into the pillow as Gilbert fucked him from behind.

It was good. It was _very_ good. Gil had set a ridiculously fast pace and had managed to keep it, and Lovino felt his sanity shatter with each thrust. Part of his screaming might have been incoherent encouragement, and part of it might have been Gilbert's name over and over again.

Gilbert himself wasn't screaming, but Lovino heard every groan and every moan and, even better, every broken utterance of his own name gasped against his nape.

* * *

When they finished, Gil collapsed by his side on the small bed, and it took them a few minutes just to catch their breaths.

"That was good," panted Lovino.

"Yeah," agreed Gilbert.

"Wanna do it again?"

Gilbert's laugh was breathless and raspy and the sexiest Lovino had ever heard.

"Give me a minute."

* * *

The second time, Gilbert insisted that he wanted to see Lovino's face, and Lovino only made him beg a little before he agreed.

Laying on his back, he gasped and moaned when Gil took him again, slower this time, and took the chance to explore his body. He ran his hands down Gil's well-defined chest and abs, and around his broad shoulders; he left the mark of his nails on his strong back. And when he brushed his fingers through Gilbert's silver hair, he was pleased to feel it as soft as he'd imagined.

Gil buried his face on the crook of Lovino's neck, his thrusts coming more and more erratic, and his laugh was apologetic when he mumbled: "I'm out of shape…"

Lovino grinned, pulled Gilbert into a kiss, then nudged him until they'd switched and now it was him looming over his partner.

"And how's that a problem?" he mumbled in reply as he positioned himself over Gil, aligning himself over his cock then descending slowly, taking him in again.

Gilbert moaned loudly, throwing his head back and closing his eyes.

Panting, Lovino decided he was going to enjoy the view and started moving.

* * *

"Oh, that was _good_."

"It was."

"I think I need a shower."

"Our shower isn't too big, but I think we can fit together."

"Perfect."

* * *

Lovino didn't miss Gil's confused look at the pierced bottle that acted as a showerhead.

"Antonio's doing," he explained as he turned on the water. "He's good at this kind of creative solutions. One time the toaster broke and he used his laptop's charger to warm up the bread and—"

Gilbert's arms were around his body, pulling him back against his chest. He was hard again, Lovino felt him when he nudged against his ass.

"Can we not talk about Antonio now?" asked Gil, his voice rough against Lovino's ear, and Lovino was quick to nod.

"Yes."

The tiles were cold against his back when Gilbert pushed him to the wall, but he didn't have it in him to complain, not when Gil kissed him hard on the mouth and rubbed their erections together. His head spinning, Lovino did the only thing he could trust himself to do: kiss Gilbert, and masturbate him, and rejoice on the symphony of their moans as they brought each other to completion for the third time in a row.

* * *

They were making out on the couch when they heard the rattling of keys on the hall, and were quick to pull apart before Antonio walked into the apartment.

"Hey guys," he said, tiredly. "I'm sorry."

"Stop apologizing," Lovino replied, walking up to meet him. "It wasn't your fault."

"Yeah, what he said," Gil agreed.

"I know, but still… Sorry, man," he said to Gilbert. "I'll invite you over some other time for paella, promise."

"Great!" Lovino and Gilbert exclaimed at the same time.

Antonio's glaze flew between the two of them. "I take it you two got along?" he asked, his face brightening up. "I'm glad!"

Lovino smiled. Gilbert grinned.

"Yes, you can say we did."

* * *

Gilbert left not much later. He had other compromises, and his stay at their flat had already prolonged for much longer than he'd planned. Both flatmates walked him to the door, where Lovino offered him a handshake and Antonio hugged him tightly. Gil waved them goodbye one last time and left.

Lovino fought to hold back a sigh. He already missed him.

And that's when he noticed that Antonio was looking at him with a knowing—shit-eating—grin.

"Well?" he purred. "How did it go?"

_He knows_. The thought flashed through Lovino's head so fast he felt dizzy. But, _No_ , he replied, _there's no way he could know_.

"He's a nice guy," he answered nonchalantly. "We got along just fine."

Antonio narrowed his eyes into an expression that screamed that he would have smelled the lie miles away.

"Lovino," he said. "I got here, like, two hours ago."

"You _what_?"

"What I said. Then, of course, I heard some _very interesting_ noises coming from your bedroom, so I decided to leave and come back later."

Lovino's jaw dropped in horror. "You _heard us_?"

"Oh, yes. You weren't being exactly quiet, you know. By the way — you never scream like _that_ when you're with me."

"You never do to me the things _he_ did," Lovino retorted.

" _Ouch_. Although Gil is admittedly better built than me, so…" he shook his head in a contemplative manner. "Anyway, are you going to call him?"

"Wha—Yes, I planned to. I like him."

"Awesome."

"Can we please stop talking about Gil? How's your car?"

"The car, yes!" Antonio grinned his Cheshire cat grin. It was a grin that, in all the time that Lovino had known Antonio, he had learnt to recognize as the grin that meant that Antonio was about to pull out some serious bullshit. Or, as was the case, to confess it. "What if I told you that it's been out of gas for a week?"

Lovino didn't say anything for a moment, waiting for more explanations. But Antonio didn't say anything else, that irritating grin plastered on his face, and with every passing second Lovino grew more annoyed.

And then, suddenly, it all made sense.

"Antonio," he said, slowly, trying not to yell. "The chicken, the flat tires… Did you stage all of that just to try to hook me up with Gil?"

Part of him expected Antonio to deny it. Another expected for him to apologize. Instead, Antonio only grinned even wider and:

" _Try_? If you ask me, it was an absolute success!"

Lovino facepalmed so hard he wouldn't be surprised if he had a bump in the morning.

"Why?" he simply asked.

"Because I know you and I know him and I just knew that you'd be perfect for each other!"

"And couldn't you just introduce us like _normal people_?!"

"I could've, yes," he shrugged. "But it wouldn't have been half as fun."

"Oh my god," Lovino cried out, dropping his head on his hands. "Honestly, Antonio, I… I don't know what to say."

"How about _thank you_?"

"I _refuse_ to thank you for this."

Antonio hummed. "You may not believe me when I say this, but I've been thinking about this day for a while," he said, the Cheshire grin replaced by a soft, honest smile. "I did think about introducing you like _normal people_ , but it just wouldn't have been the same. If there'd been more of us there, you wouldn't have talked to him; and if I'd set up a date, then both of you would've been way too nervous. This was natural," he shrugged. "And it just comes to show how well I know my good pal and my best friend," he added with a wink.

Lovino listened in silence, then stayed silent for a little longer.

Then he pulled Antonio into a hug.

"Thank you," he mumbled against his chest. "You're the best best friend I could've asked for."

"You're welcome," Antonio smiled. "Make me your best man at the wedding."

Lovino huffed.

"Ah, by the way, Antonio."

"Yes?"

"We used your lube and condoms."

Antonio's snort was halfway between a sigh and a laugh.

"Best man _and_ godfather to your firstborn."

* * *

"Hang on a second — if you didn't go to the market, then where have you been all this time?"

"Oh, at the bar downstairs with Francis."

" _Francis knows about this?!_ "

**FIN**

**Author's Note:**

> This wasn't going to have smut when I started writing it, but then it happened and I just rolled with it. At 3 AM. Because.
> 
> Hope you liked it! I destroyed my sleep schedule for this :'D Comment?


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